As a columnist, I spend time considering what I’m going to write and the audience that is likely to enjoy it. I try to make my writing humorous or interesting—hopefully both. I’m sure, for some, I fall flat, but I rarely hear about it. Perhaps I should thank Facebook’s inability to post Canadian news—I don’t have to confront the fickle beast of the comment section.
However, one bleary-eyed morning a few weeks ago, I made a post I thought little about. And the comment section came for me.
No, I didn’t post a politically charged comment. I didn’t spout a feminist manifesto that the patriarchy couldn’t handle. My offence? Posting on a craft-shaming page.
The page is called “That’s It! I’m Craft Shaming!” Join at your own risk.
So, as I was mindlessly scrolling, I saw a suggested post from a crocheting group that, to me, looked like a simple, flesh-toned crocheted washcloth with a woman’s face embroidered on it. It was ugly and weird. I barely read the caption that accompanied it, screenshotted the thing, blurred out the poster’s name, and re-posted it to the craft-shaming page.
Then I went and had a shower.
By the time I came out, there were over 40 comments and a bunch of reactions. What had I done?
Apparently, the craft was a Doctor Who reference. And apparently, Doctor Who fans are very, very serious about their fandom.
Ah well, I thought, and edited my post to acknowledge that I had not really read the offending post, did not know it was Doctor Who, my bad, everyone settle down.
But it didn’t stop. No one settled down.
By the end of Day 1, I had over 800 reactions and nearly 500 comments. They all fell into about four categories.
The first were those who loved the craft and had to tell me they loved it—and tag their friends. These comments would create threads of crocheters sharing links to the pattern.
The second were people who simply wrote “Moisturize me!”—which was apparently this character’s tagline.
The third were people calling me stupid over and over again—for not knowing Doctor Who, for not reading the original post closely enough, and for just existing in the first place. I was told to “use my grey matter.” I was told I was trying to get attention, that it was rage-bait—like I must have known how sensitive Doctor Who fans are. I was insulted and ridiculed by hundreds of strangers on the internet.
The last were the ones trying to defend me against all this vitriol, who would then get into their own debate threads with the less understanding commenters.
To be clear, I was not reading all the comments. Who could, and who would? This pattern was evident every time I picked up my phone and saw the latest comments. I let it continue—any attempt to defend myself seemed to just activate the masses and invite a new deluge of comments, some calling me out for “playing the victim.”
Rather than feel the hurt that was intended, I saw it as an experiment. How long would this go on for?
It took about five days before the algorithms allowed the masses to move on to some other distraction. In the end, 1,615 people reacted, and 919 people felt moved to comment.
My lessons?
No matter how well-adjusted you are, receiving that many hateful comments is not an easy thing to weather. Always be mindful of what and where you are posting.
And—most importantly—I made a classic blunder. The most famous of which is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well known is this: never insult a Doctor Who fan when a craft is on the line!
(If you don’t know that’s a Princess Bride reference, I’ll have to roast you in the comments.)