Authors note: In 2015 my family moved to Haida Gwaii. Marianne Jones is my wife and she is Haida. I am Maliseet from New Brunswick And our furry family member is Boyz Jones, from Belgium, via Alberta.
Hello everyone. Woof.
My name is Boyz Jones, first of his name. I am the protector of the cedar wall. I am descended from a long line of Schipperke K-9’s. I come from the Icarus clan, born in the treaty lands of the Cree in central Alberta. My ancestors come from Flanders, Belgium. We were discovered in the 15th century by Kings and Queens, so we are the oldest dog breed from Europe. That’s why my humans designate me, HRH. Our ancestors came to North America in the late 19th century and that makes me a settler dog.
We now live in Skidegate, Haida Gwaii but I was raised in Musqueam BC for the first ten years of my life. I walk in the Antler Cove neighborhood every morning, afternoon and night. I need to check my pea-mail frequently to answer fan letters and what not. I also have to reply, sometimes twinkle here and there or when I want to make my human happy, I will empty out my bowels. I have many friends and fans. The Barkers call me uncle. Django Thompson always lunges at me (I think it to sniff at my center). Roxy likes to greet me when we walk by her house. And Barney Shoop, the obnoxious but cute little puppy is a charm. And I loooove Dup-Dup Boyko.
I pay homage to my earlier friends who have ventured into the spirit world, the happy chewing grounds of K-9’s. My first Haida Gwaii friend was Chewy Lund, then I met Ice Cube Pearson, a legend in his own time, said to have fathered many Pomeranians in the hood. I miss Bailey Shoop, older brother of Barney and everyone misses the baritone barks of Yukon. The dogs in this hood are outstanding examples of their breeds. RIP my old friends.
Of course, there are some breeds, usually off-leash, who think they own the neighborhood. But that’s life, filled with anxiety and angst. Afterall, we K-9’s face oppression in ways humans cannot understand. Grrrr. Think of the leash for example. I don’t like it but I live with it. My humans think that I will run away. Hello! I love them and would never abandon my feeders. So what? I like to play hide and seek now and then. They think the racoons will eat me, of that I am particularly offended.
I am thrilled to be accepted by the good people at Haida Gwaii News and I like their name, Gumboot Press. One of my humans loves her gumboots. At first, I thought the boots would be yummy. But dang, I can’t get into them. I prefer tenderloin, pork or beef. But mostly I cherish my cow hoofs. Once while walking on a trail in Steveston we ran across some cows. I eyed that thing up and when I discovered they had hoofs I wanted to know more. I wanted to lick it, or at least sniff it. Was that what I have been chewing, going on 15 years? Hmm.
I won’t be saying too much at this point because Jeff had to come up with more ideas and, so I said that I could guest host his first column. “I could do it” I told him.
Most people think dogs are dumb. They think we can’t talk. They think we will just drop everything when they say, “come here”. Well, we aren’t here to respond to your beck and call, unless it is a call to eat. Me, well I’ll think it over first. They want us to go lay down when all we want to do is play. And how about when they want us to roll over. C’mon. OK, I’ll shake your hand for a cookie but that’s where I draw the line.
My humans are super nice. He sings to me, but she is the main walker. He plays with me out back but she is the one who drives me to town every other day and we walk a trail where I leave signs of my good eating habits. Sometimes there are rude dogs in town. Their humans say they are friendly, but they come charging up to me in a typical display of macho self. I don’t have time for that and she doesn’t put up with. I say, “fugget about it” (in air quotes), and we move on.
Finally, I want to pay homage to my relatives in California where over 600 mountain lions have been consumed by the untimely blaze ignited Los Angeles county. In Pasadena alone more than 400 animals were displaced. I can’t imagine the impact this would have on emotional stability.
We are so lucky to live on Haida Gwaii. I am glad we moved here.
It is time I go stand at the door so I can go out back. My paws are sore as Jeff didn’t get the dog paw keyboard. In the next column he wants to talk about a tree. Can you believe it?
“I’ll be back”. Woof.